Coming Clean
by starlesscity
Summary: Yugi decides to help an upset Atem, but unbeknownst to him, Atem's depression comes from the deep feelings he has for his light. People should know by now that most secrets don't keep forever. Puzzleshipping.


**Disclaimer:** Yeah, no, sorry guys. I'm just having a little bit of fun with them for a friend of mine.

**Full ****Summary:** Yugi decides to help an upset Atem, but unbeknownst to him, Atem's depression comes from the deep feelings he has for his light. People should know by now that most secrets don't keep forever.

**Pairing ****List:** Atem(Yami)/Yugi

**Beta:** Unavailable at the moment.

**A/N + ****Dedication:** This is for xoxheart because she's awesome and asked me. Enough said, really. Sorry it took so (epically, epically and soso badly) long, sweetie.

This is for her below prompt:

"_Yami __is __feeling __slightly __angsty, __and __Yugi __makes __him __feel __better __with __a __new __experience, __or __food, __or __words, __or __whatever __the __hell __you __feel __like __writing __at __the __moment_".

This is my first time pairing these two in fiction so hopefully it works out… heh.

(Sorry I've been so long between well... posting anything. Real life, commitments, you know the drill. My apologies.)

* * *

><p><em>Coming Clean<em>

It wasn't what one would call a classically beautiful day. Clouds were covering the sky and rain had been falling on and off since the night before, littering the sidewalks with a collection of puddles. A whipping, cold wind was also curling throughout the city of Domino.

Yugi Mutou's smile was a little rueful as he pulled his jacket tighter, pressing his groceries against his chest in lieu of a zipper. If he hadn't of been in such a rush to leave this morning, he'd have paid more attention to the clothing he had grabbed. Struggling with his umbrella when he already had full hands, Yugi pressed his foot against the grocery store's door to hold it open.

"You going to be okay there?"

Tilting his head backwards, Yugi gave the storeowner a bright smile. "Thank you, but yes, I'll be fine!"

Yugi faced the street once more with determined eyes. Sliding out of the doorway, he shook out his umbrella and pulled it over his head - keeping his bags mostly undisturbed, but still checking just in case. Confirming everything was where it should be he started making his way down the street and back to his home.

Luckily there were few people out and Yugi was quick to move along, not needing to dodge people or share the sidewalk. His groceries today were some of the most important, and he knew he would risk a longer journey or a wetter one if it kept them safe. Yugi knew that he wasn't a pushover anymore, and he certainly wasn't as timid as he'd been in high school, but he was still short and small and carrying a large amount of unbalancing items.

But everything would be worth it; because even if he had to dodge a hundred people during the middle of a storm, he would do anything for Atem.

His darker half was his guardian, his friend and his life. Yugi would do whatever he needed to for the ancient Pharaoh, and if that was a secret trip to the shops on a rainy day to surprise Atem and try and make him happy again… well, Yugi wasn't just out here for no reason!

The change had been subtle at first, Yugi had hardly noticed it, but slowly, over the last few months Atem had been acting differently.

The Pharaoh seemed withdrawn, locking himself in his mind and making sure to keep Yugi out. Of course, Yugi hadn't really tried to enter his dark's soul room, respecting Atem's privacy, but he was _worried_.

At first he'd been willing to allow his other half as much time and space as he needed, but it had been happening for _months_ now and Yugi couldn't keep watching him struggle from a distance anymore.

They were dark and light and if Atem needed help, Yugi wanted to be there to offer it to him.

He had spent a few days planning and watching the Pharaoh closely and had decided that they should just have a nice evening - a peaceful night indoors with Atem's favourite things. It would be a way to show him that he was not alone and that whatever was wrong would be faced together as they always had since finding each other.

Yugi knew that Atem loved the rain, and had a unique appreciation for it after living in Egypt and growing up through droughts. Yugi was glad of the weather for that reason; he hoped it would help put the other in a relaxed state of mind.

Atem wasn't going to want to talk about this easily; he had been far too guarded over it already, but Yugi wasn't about to let that stop him from trying! He'd spent a lot of time preparing this and wasn't about to have his worries get in the way.

The shop and house was theirs for the evening and Yugi wasn't about to let it go to waste. They were going to close early and he was going to start everything as soon as possible. All he needed to achieve it was being carried in his arms, wrapped in three paper bags. Yugi was ready and Atem was waiting at the Kame Game shop, unsuspecting and unprepared.

Yugi wasn't devious by nature, but with the friends he kept and the things he'd done… if it was for the greater good, he could be.

Turning down the last corner, Yugi saw the shop and smiled. The lights were on and they made the windows of the store glow welcomingly. Yugi hefted his shopping bags closer, manoeuvring around the few puddles in his way before reaching the door, thankfully, with relative dryness.

Taking down his umbrella, Yugi tried to shake the excess water off it with one hand as the other clutched his bags. The task was made harder when attempting to stay under the small shop's railing to keep dry. He'd have to talk to Grandpa about fixing that.

Glancing briefly at the door with slight worry, he wondered how he could possibly manage getting inside if these small movements were causing such problems.

The thought of using his umbrella as a means of pushing the door open was half-hearted at best, and before he could come up with anything better the door suddenly _was_ opened. Surprised and almost falling from having been leaning on it, Yugi managed to only get some of his hair wet before he leaned back under the railing, finding himself inches from Atem.

The darker's shoulders had relaxed at seeing him, a soft look gracing his face, but only for one relieved moment before concern filled his eyes. He was quick to gesture Yugi inside, taking the umbrella from him. His hand lingered near Yugi's shoulder blades, wanting to guide him into the shop, but stopping and letting his arm falling back to his side before he either touched or was noticed. "Are you alright, Yugi?"

Yugi gave him a grin. "I'm fine, Atem! You really don't have to worry so much." He hefted the bags up closer, wanting to obscure the other's view. He made his tone teasing, hoping to elicit a smile from the older teen. "I can take care of myself, you know."

"I do," he answered quietly, and Yugi knew he wasn't meant to hear the sigh that followed the Pharaoh's words as he packed up the umbrella into the stand near the door.

Atem didn't really look any different when he turned back to Yugi, yet somehow, to the lighter half he just _did_. It served to strengthen Yugi's resolve to discover what was so inherently _wrong_ with his dark no matter how hard Atem tried to hide it.

"Allow me to help you, abidou**[1]**," Atem said, taking a step forward.

Yugi just took a matching one backwards, inching closer towards the door that led into the house. He gave the other a smile to hopefully soften the motion. "I'm fine, Atem. The kitchen counter's not far away and I want to prepare something."

"I could assist you with getting things ready?"

"No thanks, I'll be alright." Then. "Besides, we need someone to watch the shop."

"I thought we were going to close early today?" Atem questioned with furrowed eyebrows.

"We are, but I want to try something new with dinner tonight." Yugi glanced down at his shopping bags before back up at Atem, feeling only a little shy when he added, "And I want it to be a surprise."

Atem was quiet for a few moments before he gave Yugi a gentle, half-grin. "If you wish, Yugi, then I shall remain out here."

"Great!" Yugi's whole face brightened. "Thanks, Atem. I'll get straight to work on dinner. It should be ready in," he scrunched his eyebrows, thinking about the recipes he had hidden in the bag he was holding, "about forty minutes."

He went to turn towards the door, but hesitated for a moment. Atem noticed and frowned. "Yugi?"

Deciding quickly, Yugi walked over to the counter and carefully put down his shopping before heading purposefully over to Atem. He didn't giving him a moment to react; Yugi just curled his arms around the other's waist in a tight hug.

He felt Atem stiffen slightly, but he ignored it. This was the worst part about Atem's recent behaviour; he'd either stopped completely or tensed at their usual hugs and even shied away from the times Yugi had tried to link their hands. Yugi didn't understand it, and although it had hurt, for Atem, he had been keeping his distance from him, stopping himself from initiating their usual closeness. If he was going to fix things tonight though, then he wasn't going to stay away anymore. He'd _missed_ hugging his dark and he was going to change everything back to the way it was.

But as a few long seconds stretched and the hug wasn't returned, Yugi felt some of his confidence fall. He was about to pull away, to begin dinner with a much more discouraged and heavy heart, when he felt hesitant arms come to wrap around his back. Yugi practically melted into his dark at the faint touch, barely realising how tense he'd been until that moment. He buried his face into Atem's chest and breathed in the familiar and half-forgotten scent, feeling calm for the first time in months.

"Yugi?" Atem asked again, his voice unreadable beyond confusion and Yugi hated it.

He closed his eyes tightly, knowing he couldn't say all the things he wanted to, couldn't ask all the questions he had on the tip of his tongue and couldn't stay wrapped in the only place he felt safe and at home.

Pulling back with great difficulty, their arms slipped to each other's hips. His cheer was only half-forced as he said quickly, "I hope you like what I have planned tonight, Atem."

Yugi didn't wait for a response, just pulled away and hurried to grab his shopping bags and disappear into the other room, leaving Atem in the Game shop, staring after him.

Yugi never saw Atem's shoulders hunch and his eyes close as he ran a hand through his hair, heading behind the counter with heavy strides.

On the other side of the door Yugi was busy rushing towards the kitchen. It was true that he felt protected in his dark's arms, but it wasn't enough when it wasn't _him_ who needed it. This was about Atem, not himself. That was the point of all of this and if Yugi had to, he'd cook and hug and talk and never, ever leave the Ancient Pharaoh's side if it would only give Atem half of the safety it gave him.

It would take time to work towards it, Yugi knew, but if nothing else, tonight he was going to break through the barrier that Atem had put between them; the barrier that he had _let_ the other build by staying back so far that a simple embrace now seemed so out of place.

Because Yugi Mutou was not going to stand idly by anymore; he was going to make everything better! Just like when he got the Millennium puzzle years ago, he wouldn't stop until he achieved his goal.

Placing his things on the counter, Yugi began pulling out the items and recipe he needed for the first course.

_Roz__Bel__Khalta_.**[2]**

He just hoped his skills at cooking translated into Egyptian meals too…

**-break-**

"Atem, Atem, I'm _fine_," Yugi stressed loudly his eyes flicking to the door and hoping his dark wouldn't come in as he carefully tried to take his frantically overflowing and boiling pot off the stove.

"_Yugi_," Atem's concerned voice was slowly evaporating into stern demands, "allow me into this kitchen so that I may assist you."

Reaching for his already slightly charred oven mit, Yugi persisted, "No, really, I'm fine."

He waved the mitten over the pot frantically, trying to disperse some of the steam before attempting to take the handles.

"You may well be, but I am beginning to wonder of the wellbeing of this house." Yugi heard a fist land on the door in a firm pound. "Allow me access, Yugi!"

"I think you are overreacting, Atem. There's really nothing to worry about."

"You swore!" Yugi's eyes flicked to the door, a slight pout briefly gracing his face. He truly believed Atem sounded far more scandalised than he had any right to be considering the language that came out of Bakura's mouth on a regular basis.

Besides, it was not _his_ fault that the oven mit decided to burst into mild flames the same moment the stove committed a mutiny against him. He wasn't quite ready to open the door and see what a mess their dinner was. He was still hoping to salvage the pot though; all he needed to do was get it off the boil.

"I'm sure you misheard me," Yugi absently replied to Atem while cautiously reaching over the frothing pot to turn off the hotplate.

"I did not mishear you! Now I demand to know what is going on in there!"

"I'm just preparing dinner," Yugi grabbed and yanked the pot from one hotplate to the next, breathing a sigh of relief when some new disaster didn't occur, "that's all."

"Something is going wrong, and I demand-"

The Pharaoh was cut off by a large shriek and without thinking, Atem burst into the room to find the younger teenager frantically flinging the tea towel he'd had draped over his shoulder into the sink, a line of flames still climbing up the end of it.

Yanking off his now black-tipped mitten, Yugi turned the tap on forcefully, quelling the fire before waving his hand above it to thin out the smoke wafting from the sink.

It was only when he turned off the tap and very little smoke still remained that he let out a breath and said sadly, "I bought Grandpa that."

The despairing words snapped Atem out of his shock and he rushed over to the other. Turning him with gentle but forceful hands, he looked a now wide-eyed Yugi over. "Are you alright? Were you burnt? Are you in need of a Doctor?"

Yugi looked close to panic as his eyes darted around frantically. "I told you I was fine! You're not supposed to be in here!" He tried to pull his dark towards the door by his shirt sleeve, but found the Ancient Pharaoh largely unmoveable. Having no success he faced his dark with beseeching eyes, "_Atem._"

Atem looked both stunned and worried. "I am not meant to be in here? _You_ should not be in here! You have screamed and you have sworn and you have started a small fire! I will not leave this room unless you are both with me, and everything is turned off!"

"I don't need you to worry, Atem," Yugi told him, smiling as confidently as he could when all he could think about was the burning smell that permeated the room – the one from _before_ his towel and mitten had caught fire. "I have everything under control."

"I will not leave you alone, Yugi." Atem said firmly, crossing his arms and holding his ground. "I will not allow you to come to further harm for _any_ surprise, my own or another's."

Yugi finally allowed his fingers to slip free from Atem's shirt. "I did not 'come to harm'."

"You were burnt."

"The _mitten_ was."

"When it encased your hand and caused you to swear," His frowned deepened at the memory. "You were hurt."

"I was _startled_, Atem."

Atem's eyes glinted with something Yugi didn't catch. He held out his palm. "Then show me your hands."

Yugi's eyes widened and he resisted the urge to shove his fingers behind his back. "W-What?"

Atem didn't pause. "Show me your hands, abidou. If you are truly unharmed I will wait outside the door once more until you are done."

He tried not to fidget as his other half waited expectantly. He needed Atem out of the room, but he couldn't think of a way to achieve it without real and truly _lying_ to him - something Yugi could never bring himself to do.

"Urrr." Yugi mumbled, rapidly searching for possible solutions, however, before he could come up with something an ominous sound emanated from the stove causing them both to turn towards it.

When a similar noise was released a few seconds later, Atem subtly arranged himself between the stove and Yugi. "Something is wrong." He started moving backwards, a hand going out to press against Yugi's chest and attempt to guide him towards the door. "We need to leave."

Shaking his head, Yugi tried to push past, but Atem held him back. "I have to turn off the oven! It's just overheating!"

"It may very well explode; you will do no such thing!"

"Atem-"

Atem swung around to look firmly at the other. "You will not. _I_ will turn it off."

Yugi wanted to protest, but he knew the look in his dark's eyes, he had seen it many times over the years, at all those moments when Atem would push himself in the path of danger just to protect him. When he would take any pain, any risk if it meant Yugi was safe.

It was what Yugi had been trying to do, trying to _return_ tonight in the only way he could; by caring. By making an Egyptian dinner followed by Atem's favourite dessert, favourite movies and a new American game he knew his dark had been interested in playing.

He had been doing all he could to look after Atem, but somehow it had managed to end up the way it always did; with his dark looking after him. Yugi clenched his fists tightly behind his back while trying to push down on the ball of uselessness and upset that was building in his chest as Atem strode over to the oven; his body always blocking Yugi's. His every step was measured to protect him no matter how far away they were.

"Leave this room, Yugi, I can not be sure it is safe."

Yugi didn't look away from him. "I'm not leaving you."

Atem went still before he slowly turned his head to look over his shoulder. Yugi's whole body radiated determination and a stubbornness that Atem knew rivalled his own, but it was the look in his eyes, the sheer devotion that made the Pharaoh's heart both rise and fall.

He knew the chances of injury were low, that the height of tension in the room was not from danger alone - but emotions. What they were however, Atem wouldn't dare name. Looking away from the intensity of his light's eyes, he turned to face the machine he was now inches in front of. Reaching out, he turned it off with a resounding, and simple click.

The moment stretched, the air taut with such emotional electricity that it felt like a wire being increasingly pulled towards its snapping point.

It was with soundless steps that Atem never heard over his turbulent thoughts that Yugi walked up behind him. The faint touch to his shoulder made Atem flinch but before he could otherwise react, arms were around his middle and Yugi was aligned and pressed against his back.

"Thank you, Atem," he whispered, "you always protect me." A soft sigh. "I just sometimes wish it was _me_ who could protect _you_."

Atem swallowed, his heart flaring in his chest and his hand moving of its own accord to rest over one of Yugi's. He stared unseeingly at the wall in front of him, trying to keep his mind tethered to the reality he had, not the one he wished for.

He felt Yugi's fingers link with his and his eyes slipped closed; for a few moments he allowed himself to relax into the other, memorising the feel of the shorter teen against his back, head resting against his shoulders and creating a warmth that went directly through to his heart.

He wished it could be true.

That thought, more than anything else made him release the other's hand and start to move away.

"Atem?"

"This stove may still be unsafe; we should allow it time to cool before investigating further."

Drawing away from Yugi, he watched his light's face fall for a brief moment before a wholly unfelt smile was being placed on the younger's lips. "I suppose we'll have to wait a while for dinner."

He wondered briefly what Yugi had been trying to cook - _for__him_. "Yes, I do not think anyone would be delivering in this weather, and we have not the means to prepare anything else."

"Don't worry, I have another option!" Yugi went over to one of the paper bags still on the counter. He was careful to keep the items from Atem's view as he pulled out a bag of popcorn. "I guess we'll be starting the snacks earlier than I planned."

"I suppose we will," Atem agreed watching while Yugi turned off the last remaining items in the kitchen before placing the popcorn in the microwave. He tired not to notice the obvious slump in his light's posture.

He held his hands back, trying not to reach out and pull them back into an embrace, to prove that he didn't care about not having Yugi's surprise as long as Yugi himself was with him and okay.

Atem tried not to imagine pulling Yugi tight into his arms, and kissing his unhappiness away.

**-break-**

The silence between them stretched for a few long minutes as they waited for the popcorn to cook. Yugi thought of a million topics in that time, but couldn't put any of them into words. He'd ruined the dinner - _ruined_ _Atem's_ Egyptian meals. He couldn't understand how it had turned so wrong so fast when all he'd been trying to do was make things perfect!

He'd made so many lists, asked his Grandpa if they could have the shop to themselves and called all their friends asking them not to come round. He'd gone over everything and yet the one thing he hadn't doubted would be fine had fallen apart from the moment he'd turned it on!

Yugi tried not to let out a frustrated sound when Atem was still standing behind him but he was feeling so disheartened. He couldn't let Atem see it though, not when he was leaning against one of the benches and watching his movements like a hawk as Yugi prepared the snacks for them.

He knew Atem was probably still worried something else might happen and hurt him, but he couldn't imagine much going wrong with the popcorn, caramel chocolates, pocky or arare**[3]** that he was putting into bowls for them to share.

Yugi perked up slightly, because that was just it, wasn't it? The dinner may have gone wrong, but that was okay because Atem was still here, the rain was still falling and they had snacks and movies to watch. The dango was still in the fridge with the ice cream he'd bought. He wouldn't be able to bake the cake he'd planned, but if he needed to he could always get out the bag of cookies in the cupboard.

They _had_ food, but more importantly they had each other and that was all they really needed in the end.

Turning to face his dark with renewed energy and a true smile, he held out the bowl of arare and the cup he'd put the mixed pocky in. "Could you take these to the lounge room, Atem? I'll be along with the popcorn and chocolates when the microwave's done."

Atem didn't look pleased with the idea, but since the oven had yet to make any further noises, and the open window was now dispersing the room of smoke and smell, he walked over to take them. "Very well, Yugi."

"Thanks." It was as Atem took the items from his hands that Yugi was struck with the sudden image, the strong _urge_ to lift himself up and to thank his dark as Anzu had thanked him the last time Yugi had seen her - with a soft kiss on the cheek.

He felt his face flush and he hurriedly turned around to face the microwave. Instinctively, his hand went to touch the puzzle that was no longer there, to block the thoughts from Atem who Yugi couldn't imagine understanding them when he himself never could.

Biting his bottom lip, he did his best to ignore the other who was still standing far too close behind him, and no doubt staring with ever growing perplexity. Yugi knew it was not the first time stray thoughts like these had found their way into his mind, but each time they did Yugi found himself so utterly embarrassed and thrown off guard with their appearance that he knew they'd never go any further.

And then there was the question that always came with them; just what did it mean when he wanted to kiss his darker half?

The soft sound of Atem's footfalls as he left the kitchen gave Yugi the chance to take a breath and shake the subject from his head. Whatever it meant, it could be discovered later, for now, he had to stop focusing on _himself_ and look back towards _Atem_.

Hearing the microwave sound its completion had him opening the door and cautiously taking out the warm bag, pouring the popped kernels into the bowl. When nothing exploded or popcorn went flying, he let out a brief sigh and took the remaining food and some soda out to the lounge room.

Finding the door left open, he went inside but paused when he noticed Atem standing beside the coffee table playing with a piece of arare and staring at the wall with drawn down eyebrows.

Concerned, Yugi asked, "Atem? Are you alright?"

The Pharaoh blinked before holding out his hand, the snack now resting in his palm. "This is my favourite brand of arare."

"I know," Yugi replied, puzzled. "That's why I got it."

"And these are the only pocky I like." His eyes glanced over the bowls in Yugi's hands. "You have bought all my most liked foods." His hand closed around the cracker. "Why?"

Yugi shifted uneasily. "I just thought it would be nice to have an evening in together."

"But you have only brought my foods, not your own…"

"I like what you like," Yugi tried. It wasn't a lie, but it also wasn't the full truth, but he didn't know how to start explaining that - not when his own thoughts were so disjointed with an action he wanted but could never attempt. Not when Atem was still pulling away from him.

Atem shook his head. "You do not enjoy savoury arare."

"Maybe I wanted a change?"

"I do not believe you would do so easily."

Yugi felt a spike of agitation, but he made himself ignore it. "It doesn't hurt to try new things, Atem."

"Perhaps," he agreed slowly, "But it does not explain why you have been acting so strangely, Yugi…"

Yugi blinked. "_I__'__ve_ been acting strangely?"

The accusation came out before Yugi could stop it and Atem's eyes widened, "Abidou?"

It was at that simple question that Yugi felt a rush of emotion take him over and he couldn't stop himself from continuing, his voice bursting with things long locked inside his chest. "For months now you have been nothing like yourself, Atem and I have been so _worried_. I had no idea what to do to help! I just wanted to show you how much I cared and to help you the way you've always helped me!"

Walking forward he forcefully shoved the bowls done on the couch, not caring that a few kernels tipped out onto the cushions, his eyes solely on Atem and his voice rising with each word. "All I was doing was planning a dinner for you because _you_ had been strange. But then, then it was when the oven destroyed the Roz Bel Khalta that… that it wasn't me helping you anymore it was _you_ helping _me_."

Yugi tugged at a few strands of his hair in frustration. "And I like when you protect me, when you hold me tight and keep the world from hurting me but, Atem, when I can see you in pain, I just want to find a way to make you feel better."

"Yugi," Atem murmured his eyes wide but utterly tender, "You were doing all of this… to make me happy?"

"To change you back!" Yugi almost shouted, his voice cracking on the last word and his eyes blinking to stop them from watering. His hands were in fists by his sides and he stared at Atem with nothing but hurt as his voice trailed to a whisper, "You won't hug me anymore, you won't hold my hand. I miss you so much and you haven't even left." Then, hesitantly. "I've been trying so hard to do what you needed because sometimes… sometimes I'm so scared that you're going to."

Atem was instantly before him, his hands coming up to cup the younger teen's cheeks almost before Yugi had finished speaking. His thumbs drew soothing lines along his cheekbones. "Never, abidou, never. As long as you will have me by your side than we will never be apart."

Yugi tried to understand. "Then why… then what was wrong?"

"I…" Atem faltered.

Yugi looked at him with beseeching eyes; his hands coming up to lightly hold his dark's wrists gently. "Please tell me, Atem. You can tell me anything, you always have before."

Atem's eyes flicked with emotions and his thumbs stopped their soft stroking. The sounds of the room and the rain seemed to dim. So close to the other, Yugi could see the lines of troubled thought written across the Pharaoh's face, and without considering it, he reached one hand up to lightly smooth them out.

The other's eyes snapped to his, a small hitch to his breathing just barely audible. Yugi just kept soothing the stress from his other half. Waiting.

What felt like minutes later, Atem's hand came up and caught his own and Yugi's movements stilled. Their eyes were on one another, the world stopping, holding everything for this one moment.

Atem's thumb brushed his cheek once more, a slow sweep that felt like a mark that would last for all eternity; a line of warmth. Yugi realised with a jump to his heart that their hands were now mirroring each other's.

"I have been worried, Yugi, of what you will think of me."

Atem's hand dropped, his thumb coming to lightly graze the corner of Yugi's lips, and like the one card that changed an entire hand, Yugi suddenly realised that everything he'd been missing was about to be drawn.

"Why?"

Yugi barely breathed as he waited. Atem's eyes were slowly gazing over every inch of his face as if memorising every eyelash, the way every strand of hair fell. This time, when Atem's thumb went across his cheek, it wavered. Atem's whole body was trying to shake, Yugi realised and Yugi had never seen nor imagined his dark ever being so nervous.

"Because it is wrong of me," Atem whispered and his voice sounded so desolated, lost and guilty. In those few words, Yugi could see the damage and pain the months of quiet brooding Atem had done had been causing the Pharaoh. "It is wrong of me to want these things, Yugi. To feel this way and even let a part of me wish… _hope_ you could ever consider me in any such way."

Yugi felt something clench low in his stomach and move to sit in his throat, making it hard to draw a breath, let alone talk. Was his dark truly saying…? "A-Atem…?"

Atem's eyes closed tightly and his body curled in on itself. Atem no longer looked the proud Pharaoh in a modern world, he looked the broken down King with a kingdom he could no longer protect resting on his shoulders.

His eyes opened slowly and Yugi's heart ached so much for the other that he wanted to try and rub his chest and the hurt away. "I am in love with you, Yugi. And I can not bear that trying to protect you from myself, from any pain knowing this would cause has still manage to harm you."

He took a deep breath and swallowed before slowly, as if his every move was forced, Atem pulled back and away. Yugi, his mind so stunned that he could barely think let alone move, just stood there, letting Atem pull away from him. His arms fell to his sides like lead, but still his mind tried to assemble itself.

Atem loved him. _Loved_ him. Was _in __love_ with him in a way that let him know his own thoughts, his brief considerations of kissing his dark would be returned - welcomed. That his own attempts at hugging the Pharaoh, at caring were only hurting Atem more because he was _in __love_ and thought that he would only ever be rejected.

"Oh, Atem," he whispered.

Atem held up a hand, staving off any words Yugi might have had. His hand wasn't trembling anymore, but Atem wouldn't meet his eyes. His control was in place, but only for the moment.

"I will not let it come between us. I…" he hesitated for a long moment before pushing out, "_you_ may decide what is best for us and how we will behaviour. For now, it will be best if we are not close I-" Yugi could see him choosing his words, _changing_ them, "it is best if I am not often near you for a while."

"You're afraid you'll kiss me." It was a statement, he didn't doubt it; his chest twisted one more time.

Atem's eyes flicked to his, a flash of shock in them before the sadness he was trying to hide came back. He looked away once more. "I have not kissed you yet."

"But you think you will." Then, with a flash of understanding. "You think you will _now_."

"This does not need discussion." It was the closest to a snap Yugi had ever received from the Pharaoh. "You are aware of this and you may decide what you will do."

Atem's entire posture was coiled, tense and - Yugi suddenly recognised - on the verge of fleeing, but being held in place. Atem was making himself stand through this - as if it was a trial. Atem had decided himself guilty of punishment long before he ever told Yugi. It was with sudden clarity that Yugi realised what Atem needed, what he could offer and do to show he cared. This was the way he could protect his dark without something going wrong, and without either of their heart's aching from the mistake.

It was only the first few steps that showed his hesitation before his determination of early that evening came back. Atem's startled eyes found his and watched almost apprehensively as he approached. Stopping before his dark, he did what he had wanted in the kitchen what seemed hours, not minutes ago.

Standing on tiptoe, Yugi placed a soft, chaste kiss to the Pharaoh's cheek. When he pulled back, Yugi's smile held a hint of shyness as a dusting of red heated his cheeks. Atem looked at him with wonder.

"I will never think of you any differently, Atem," he whispered. "You are my darker half, my guardian, my friend and my life. I love you too."

"This is not just friendship, Yugi…"

This time it was Yugi holding up his hand, only this time, to hold of his dark's words, his fingers were pressed lightly to Atem's lips. "I know."

The touch lingered for a long moment before Yugi pulled his hand back, biting his bottom lip nervously. He didn't get far before Atem's gentle fingers caught his own.

"You _were_ burnt," he murmured, touching the still tender flesh gently.

Yugi gave a small shrug, smiling. "I'll be okay."

Atem caught his eyes and for a second, Yugi felt his breath catch, certain his dark would do what he had warned, but the seconds passed and Atem glanced away.  
>Linking their fingers instead, he pulled Yugi towards the couch. "Come, we shall have this evening you prepared. Was there more to this surprise of yours?"<p>

Blinking a few times, Yugi asked, "You… you want to watch a movie?"

Atem's eyes weren't as happy as they once were, as they _could_ be, but the sadness was fading and a tender look now rested there. "I am happy to do anything with you now until everything else is ready."

"Until we're ready?" Yugi asked carefully.

"Yes."

He smiled, and without any prompting, Atem did too.

Maybe it wasn't exactly how he'd planned but maybe that didn't matter, because it had turned out alright. Yugi had known he couldn't help Atem or understand everything he felt all in one night, but this was a start, and maybe, in the end, they would both be happy. That was all he could have really wished for.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** And that is my attempt at a Atem/Yugi story, hopefully it's okay and the ending's alright since I already went through one of them (but I'm pretty, really happy with it now, heh.) Either way, I hope you enjoy the schmoop, if such a thing is to your liking, otherwise, well, better luck next time I guess. Thanks for reading!

**Number Notes:**

**[1]** I don't usually use Japanese names/phrases in my story but I don't like the sound of the direct translation so I'm allowing the slight to my rules in these instances. Hopefully they are not too jarring for you.

**[2]** Although it is not vastly important, this is an Egyptian dish that mostly consists of rice, beef and nuts. I figured a recipe of such simple ingredients would be pretty likely to have been around in some form during Atem's time and hopefully served at his table. Heh.

**[3]** As is usual in my anime/manga fanfiction I tend to include both Japanese and western foods to give what I deem a more 'realistic' touch to their behaviour. You guys should all know about pocky but arare is a bite-sized cracker made from glutinous rice and is either flavoured to be sweet or savoury :)


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